We all know as women we have this habit of putting people before us. We tend to neglect ourselves and put other people’s needs before our own. Especially when we’re married or just after we’ve had a baby. Oh yes, that post-natal neglection is real! I have seen it with so many women and I am probably the guiltiest of it.
And having a little Halal black dress? It’s out of the question, of course.
Why it’s So Important to Remember Ourselves
After giving birth to my son, I went through a period where I would think about him and his health so much more than my own. Especially after he developed Seborrhoea. Seborrhoea is a condition that makes the skin red and itchy with white scales. He was constantly agitated which meant I was at his beck and call with creaming his skin day and night just so it wouldn’t come back.
I was buying him organic products for his skin, organic clothes for him to wear and even went onto buying him organic bed-sheets just so he could sleep comfortably at night (*but that is a story for a different day*). This led to me completely neglecting myself which I hadn’t realized until quite recently.
Alhamdulillah today he is much better and Allah helped my husband and me to get through that tough period. At the time though, I just hadn’t realised how much I had forgotten about myself. I forgot to eat properly, take care of my skin and buy myself nice things especially clothes! I’m quite embarrassed to admit I hadn’t treated myself to anything until a year after he was born!
When I Started To Look After Myself
Yes! It took me a whole year! It took me so long to remember dressing up and making myself feel loved. I concentrated on him so much, I forgot how nice it felt to be able to love myself again, to be able to love my body and to feel good when wearing nice clothes.
Although it is well over-due, I now make sure to take time for myself every now and then. I buy myself something nice for my wardrobe and wear it for special occasions, parties, and girly gatherings or even just at home! I probably steer towards clothing more as it makes quite a significant difference to how I feel.
I have started this new rule, after going through a tough time physically, or emotionally, to take time to treat myself. Why not give it a try too? Remind yourself that you need to be loved. Gift yourself with something nice, it doesn’t have to be expensive or extravagant. Just something that will make you feel and look good.
We think you deserve a gift! Be sure to check out the shop to pick up something nice for yourself!
What I Bought and How It Made Me Feel
In the process of treating myself this month, I bought a few sparkly items for my wardrobe. I bought this gorgeous sequined dress and sparkly shoes. My husband reminded me that I don’t do it enough which really encouraged me
to go for it.
Do you ever get that special new-dress sensation? That distinctive feeling that only a beautiful new dress can give a woman? I can sense some of you ladies nodding at this point as your brain desperately tries to recall the last time you had this feel-good moment.
It’s one of those odd flashes of bliss that you don’t have to share with anyone – it’s all about you! There is that sparkly buzz when the silky material slides over your skin and, submerged in that irreplaceable new-dress scent, you run your fingers along the flawless seams and the intricate button work, immersing yourself in the work of art that is this magical dress.
A gorgeous snug fit- that you have eternally been searching for- greets you like an old friend full of compliments. You look up in the mirror and for a minute, surprised and shocked that anything could make you look so good, you find yourself lost in that heavenly moment of happiness with a smile that only you know is truly genuine.
In that moment, no matter what is going on around you, you feel good. You feel beautiful. All of a sudden, you love the little curves and bumps on your hips which until this point were mere imperfections that needed perfecting. In that moment you are the better version of you. That’s exactly how I felt when I put on my little halal black dress.
As well as making you look good, all of this “buying clothes”, especially a little Halal black dress, business might sound really materialistic but I am coming from a more self-caring point of view. For example I find it helps me with maintaining a healthy size especially as a wife.
I find looking good for your spouse always has a positive outcome. The empowerment I get when feeling healthy is what I love rather than how slobbish I can feel when constantly wearing my over-sized sweats. Even if you’re not married dressing to make yourself feel good can make so much of a difference to how you appear to yourself.
Other Ways to Love Yourself
Loving myself this month was about buying pretty clothes but there are always other ways in which you can do it and it doesn’t have to include spending money. Spend time on yourself, run yourself a beautiful warm bubble bath, get stuck into that book you’ve been meaning to but never got the time to or simply wear beautiful clothes at home. Just remind yourself you are still important.
Do you have any self love musts you would like to share with us? Leave them in the comments! We always love to inspire our readers with new ways to love themselves more, in shaa Allah!
About the Author
Sainab is a Wife and a Mother who recently started her hobby for blogging. As well as writing about home interior and fashion, she also co-founded Barakah London with her Sister. It’s a Fashion line they started a few years back where they hand-make Abayas for personal clients. You can find her sharing her experiences on home, life and love on her blog, Step Inside My Handbag, and follow her on Instagram.